Americans Are Going Into Debt To Attend Weddings

Americans are going into debt for their friends and family's weddings, and sometimes they fork over more than $2,500 to be a part of the special day.

A new LendingTree report found that among the 54 percent of Americans who attended a wedding in the past five years, 31 percent had taken on debt to do so. The survey of 2,000 Americans also found that 23 percent of that group had gone into debt of $2,500 or more.

Read more: Average Personal Loan Rates

Many of the wedding attendees felt pressured to overspend by family, with 37 percent indicating this was the case. Another 28 percent said the pressure came from friends and 26 percent said it came from the wedding couple. And despite the long-term ramifications on their finances, 74 percent who went into debt said it was worth it.

"The two hardest things to discuss at most American dinner tables are money and religion," Kevin Thompson, a finance expert and the founder/CEO of 9i Capital Group, told Newsweek. "So, this added pressure of not wanting your friends and associates to know your financial situation is important, so many will continue to live a life of overspending to mask their own inadequacies."

Some Americans are opting out of weddings that threaten their budgets, though, but this doesn't happen without consequences. Roughly a third of wedding invitees said no to a wedding invitation because of costs, but 12 percent of those said it ended up ruining their relationship with the couple.

This is despite the fact that 54 percent of respondents said they would be uncomfortable knowing attendees took on debt for their wedding.

Read more: Best Debt Consolidation Personal Loans

"People often say, 'Money does not buy happiness.' However, money can purchase time. Time to enjoy such occasions without bitterness and regret," Thompson said.

There's plenty that can add up for wedding guests, but the costs go beyond the big day itself. Among those who took debt, 74 percent said pre-wedding activities like bachelor parties or bridal showers contributed to their debt, and travel and outfit costs were also big factors.

But how much does attending these events actually cost?

The LendingTree report found 43 percent spent $100 to $499 just to attend a wedding, while 29 percent said it cost at least $500. And 12 percent admitted to spending an average of at least $1,000.

Many wedding attendees might be unsure how much they're supposed to spend to attend someone's big day, and the expectations around gift giving can complicate this even further.

"There's no-one-size-fits-all answer. What's reasonable for one person is outrageous and maddening for another," LendingTree chief credit analyst Matt Schulz said in the report. "The onus should be on the bride(s) and groom(s) to take their prospective guests' financial circumstances into consideration when planning their big day."

For those looking for ways to keep their wedding costs as a guest down, Schulz recommends cashing in rewards for free airfares and hotels, if applicable.

Read more: Compare the Best Credit Cards for Travel

Attendees should also check with other guests to see if there's an option to split some high-price costs like rooms and rental cars.

"Chances are that you're not the only one struggling with the costs of the wedding," Schulz said. "Consider reaching out to other guests about sharing some of those costs. Maybe you're sharing a room or a rental car with another bridesmaid. Maybe you split the cost of a wedding gift. There are many ways to save if you're willing to ask."

Above all, you need to be honest with your friends and family about your financial situation if it seems like it will limit your ability to celebrate on the big day.

"If you're struggling financially and can't afford to go even though you'd love to, share that with your friend or relative," Schulz said. "Good people want to help their friends, but they can't if they don't know there's a problem."

Alex Beene, a financial literacy instructor at the University of Tennessee at Martin, said that when deciding how much you're willing to fork over for someone else's wedding, always remind yourself that you're not actually the one getting married.

"You shouldn't be accruing major costs, let alone going into debt," Beene told Newsweek. "Saving money by making smarter options in what you wear or where you stay may make you worry you'll look cheap to others, but the reality is you're not the star of the weekend to begin with."

Couples who do end up planning a wedding event beyond the budgets of friends and families budgets should also consider the real-life consequences of those plans.

"When couples are asking for destination weddings or lavish events, couples should know that there are real people on the other side of the coin," Thompson said. "People are having to uproot their lives to accommodate you and your needs, whether it's plane tickets, hotels, or just gas money for travel and food."