'At 75, I Discovered I Have a Long Lost Family'

I never knew much about my dad growing up. I knew he was an American GI in the Second World War. His military number and name, Corporal Wilbert Wiley, were on my birth certificate, but I always assumed he had died in conflict. I never really had any hope of finding anything else about him.

My mother, Betty, was very young when she had me, just 18. I hate to think how much she must have struggled. Having a baby out of wedlock in the 1940s was frowned upon. My mother was white and my father was Black, so having a mixed race baby must have been even more difficult for her.

My childhood was spent in Leicester, a city in the East Midlands of England. We lived with my grandparents but it was pretty dysfunctional. I spent most of my time outside the house with my friends or playing soccer. I lived a pretty ordinary life at school. I never experienced prejudices based on the color of my skin.

My mom married, but I didn't get on too well with my step-dad. My family never talked about my real father. It wasn't a taboo subject, but nobody ever really mentioned it. I didn't ask any questions. At the time, I didn't think it mattered too much, it didn't really affect me.

When I was 17 I joined the British Royal Navy, which is one of the best things I ever did. I was in the military for nine years and often traveled to the United States. I never thought of trying to find my dad out there. It's a massive place, where would I have started?

I never wanted to inquire too much about my dad while my mom was alive. I was scared it would break her heart if we found out he was alive, so I didn't really look into that until my mom passed away. I think it would have destroyed her.

Over the years my wife, Julie, had done some family tree research, but the ball really got rolling in 2020 when my niece heard one of her work colleagues, Dr Turi King, a professor of genetics at the University of Leicester, was working on an ancestry programme focusing on the children of American soldiers, called DNA Family Secrets.

The next thing I knew I received a call from the programme's producers. Soon enough, I found out I would be featuring on the show. I went along for the ride thinking we might find out a little bit about my family, but we discovered so much more than I expected.

At the time I was 75 years old. The story I had built up of my father for all those years was that he died in the war, which put an end to worrying about difficult questions, like why he would have abandoned my mother.

I found out my dad had not died in the war, but that he would never have been able to take my mom back to America, because interracial relationships were illegal in Texas. He would never have been able to marry my mother. Even if he had loved her, it was never a possibility.

I saw photos of my father and putting his face to his name was a revelation to me. I discovered my family's rich history. One of my uncles, known as "Fireball Wiley," was the first African-American to be signed to the Abilene Blue Sox baseball team and a cousin of mine was the first Black sheriff's deputy in Taylor County, Texas.

I also discovered I had a late half-brother, who was eleven years older than me. I have living relatives including my half-brother's son, my nephew, and an uncle's two daughters, my cousins, who all live in Texas.

I first met my two cousins over video call in 2021. When I saw them I was just overwhelmed. It really was a big thing for me and opened up Pandora's Box; I just couldn't believe it. I'd grown up as a little boy feeling different to everyone around me, so to find out I was part of this family felt incredible. I find it hard to explain.

I'm actually the eldest in my U.S. family now. After my half-brother died it was kind of the end of the line for my generation, then I popped out of the woodwork! Even though we haven't met in person, I still feel like I'm part of the family.

The whole family in the U.S. were very pleased to hear about me. Texas culture is so warm and welcoming. In the U.K. we don't tend to tell each other we love each other very much, but my relatives say it all the time and you feel they mean it. They're really loving and they have huge hearts. It's just a nice feeling.

I have a real connection with my nephew and we speak, sometimes for an hour, nearly every night. It's lovely to find out all these little details about my dad and his side of the family. It means so much to me, it's been on my mind for so many years.

He will celebrate his 60th birthday in May 2023 and I'd love to travel to Texas for the occasion. Unfortunately, because I have chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) and have battled prostate cancer, the cost of insurance in the United States is just not manageable for us.

We are looking into how we can get to Texas, but have been quoted nearly $5,000 for insurance, which is out of our league. In total we have calculated around $6,000. Of course, we are trying to save money ourselves, but my wife, Julie, has set up a GoFundMe to try and raise some money.

I'm not getting any younger and I'm so passionate about going. It'll probably be the biggest event in my life. My family both in the U.S. and the U.K. have been tremendous and are doing everything they can to get me over there.

Meeting my family in person is something in my heart I really want to do. It would mean a lot to me. Of course, I've always had a family, but my life has changed forever after finding my long lost relatives; I finally feel I belong. I can't wait to go see them.

Bill Wiley, 77, from Leicester, is currently fundraising to take a trip to Texas to meet his family in person for the first time. You can visit his GoFundMe page or follow his journey on Twitter @BillsTexasDream.

All views expressed in this article are the author's own.

As told to Monica Greep.