'Cruel' Bride Slammed For Shaming Bridesmaid With Cancer Over Weight Gain

People across social media have reacted with disgust to a Reddit post shared by a user claiming to have cancer, who detailed how she dropped out as bridesmaid at one of her closest friend's wedding after the bride made a "cruel" comment about her weight.

Cancer affects a significant proportion of the U.S. population with figures published by the CDC in 2020 estimating that around 9.6 percent of adults in the U.S. have been diagnosed with the condition at one time or another in their lives.

Thankfully, there have been significant advancements in the detection and treatment of cancer over the past 20 years with CDC figures showing that death rates from the condition dropped 27 percent from 2001 to 2020.

Treatments such as chemotherapy have played a crucial role in treating the condition by destroying the cancer cells. But it does have some notable side effects as one patient, posting to Reddit as NotForKeepsThrowAway, claims to have discovered.

A woman zipping up a dress.
Stock image of a woman zipping up a dress for a wedding - a bridesmaid has walked out on one of her closest friend's wedding preparations after a comment about her weight. kkshepel/Getty

According to the post, the 24-year-old was due to serve as bridesmaid to her friend April who she has been close to since the age of nine, having first met at gymnastics as kids.

She was apparently always a shoo-in to serve as April's bridesmaid. But then the wedding got delayed as a result of COVID, and in the meantime she received the news we all fear. "I was diagnosed with cancer," she wrote. "I was lucky that we caught it early so I had surgery followed by chemotherapy."

She recalled how April was "supportive throughout all this" and was careful to schedule bridesmaid dress shopping and fittings around her friend's treatment. However, when it came time to try them on, her friend discovered her size 10 dress did not fit.

"We chose to buy mine a size up from what I wore because chemo could cause weight gain. Unfortunately I've had to go through more rounds than first predicted," the woman explained. "I was embarrassed."

As Cancer.net notes, weight gain is a common byproduct from chemotherapy. Sometimes it is a result of a condition called edema which causes the body "to hold on to excess fluid."

Chemotherapy can also cause fatigue which makes it harder to exercise while the nausea generated by the treatment is often only improved by eating more food. It has also been found to trigger "intense food cravings" while "lowering your metabolism" meaning you burn fewer calories.

The woman said that she explained the issue to April and offered to pay for the necessary "alterations to make it fit" which a seamstress insisted would be "easy to do."

According to the post, the would-be bridesmaid "thought everything was fine" until she went out to dinner with April and some friends.

"When I ordered a pasta, April gave me a strange look, then made a comment about how it was no wonder I didn't fit into the dress and how I couldn't just say the weight gain was from the chemo."

The woman said she was left "in shock" at the remarks and while one of her other friends told April it was "a horrible thing to say" the bride was a unrepentant, telling them she was worried about her friend with cancer would "ruin her wedding pictures" because she was acting like a "whale who can't stop stuffing their face."

She said she then accused April of being "cold and heartless" and told her "not to worry about the pictures" as she "wouldn't be there at all."

On top of that she said she then "told her fiancé he should just contact a divorce lawyer now to save time because it would be sad to be stuck with her" before leaving.

While some friends felt her words were "harsher than needed" and it was wrong to drop out, for those reading the post on social media, the now ex-bridesmaid's response was on the money.

Kongo204 felt the bride's comments were "not something you say to someone regardless of cancer or chemo" while Kirstemis said: "She was cruel and rude, and also very, very wrong if she thinks a size 10 is anything like fat."

Fantastic_Nebula_835 told the Redditor: "You may have been her friend for 15 years. But, she hasn't been yours" with SatoriNamast3 adding: "Your friend is making your cancer experience about herself...perhaps she's suppressing some unresolved emotions and projecting onto you."

Illustrious_Sea_5654 said she was "better off without friends like this" while SparkAxolotl felt the woman could be a size "20 and the ex friend would still be in the wrong."

"I really hope the rest of the bridesmaids ditch her," they added. "If she's as callous in person to one person she calls a close friend, I wouldn't want to know what she's saying behind my back."

Newsweek has contacted NotForKeepsThrowAway for comment.

Has a wedding come between your relationship with a loved one? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek

Uncommon Knowledge

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

About the writer


Jack Beresford is a Newsweek Senior Internet Culture & Trends Reporter, based in London, UK. His focus is reporting on ... Read more

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