'I Had a Face Transplant—Now I've Found Love'

While driving home in 2018, Joe DiMeo had hoped to climb into bed after a long night shift, but he never made it.

DiMeo, now 25, recalled the life-changing events of July 18, telling Newsweek that he "fell asleep at the wheel," causing his car to veer off the road and burst into flames.

"I was in hospital for four months, and around half of that I was in a coma," he said. "Then I spent some time coming back to my feet somewhat quickly, and by the fourth month I went to rehab."

The accident left DiMeo with burns across 80 percent of his body, leading to more than 20 skin grafts and reconstructive surgeries. But he never lost hope that one day he would lead a normal life.

Due to the severity of his situation, it was suggested that DiMeo, from New Jersey, undergo a breakthrough double hand and face transplant by a team of doctors at NYU Langone.

It took a year of testing and preparation before the complex 23-hour surgery. Only 45 patients around the world have received full or partial face transplants since 2021, according to Johns Hopkins Medicine, and just 130 reported hand transplants have taken place, meaning DiMeo's case was not only highly intricate, but was also incredibly rare.

"As soon as it was recommended as a possibility for me, I said yes to it. There was absolutely no hesitation for me. It took about two years, as there was a year of testing first, and then I got the transfer in August 2020," DiMeo said.

"The recovery was painful, but it was good overall. I mostly had nerve pain to deal with, but the nursing staff were really good to me," he said.

As there had never been a successful transplant of this difficulty carried out before, the team at NYU Langone were faced with an enormous and risky challenge. Dr. Eduardo Rodriguez, director of the Face Transplant Program and chair of the Hansjörg Wyss Department of Plastic Surgery at NYU Langone told Newsweek that "the 2020 surgery marked the first successful combination transplant case of its kind in the world."

Although the possibility of finding a compatible donor for DiMeo was just 6 percent, the search was expanded across the entire country until eventually a match was found. For the medical team who worked on DiMeo's case, watching his progress in the months and years that ensued has been nothing short of miraculous.

"It's such a gratifying feeling to see these patients do so well," Rodriguez continued. "Joe is such a wonderful guy, incredibly hardworking, and committed to regaining his independence and ability to drive again. There is nothing that brings greater gratification to a surgeon than to see an individual live their life independently."

In the three years since DiMeo's surgery, he has worked hard to gain mobility in his hands and learned how to move his face. Simple motions, such as blinking, raising his eyebrows, and moving his lips were huge challenges.

"I would say I have 45 percent usage of my hands now, but there is a chance of getting more. I'm hoping to see up to 80 percent back, but there's no promises on that," he explained.

It's still a mystery as to who helped change DiMeo's life because he doesn't know anything about the donor. All he knows is that his hands and face came from a 47-year-old male who passed away as a result of a stroke, and though it's hard to live with another person's face, he will forever be grateful to that individual.

He sees the transplant as a second chance at life, and while he looks different on the outside, he refuses to let that change who he is on the inside.

"It's up to the donor family if they want to come forward, which I understand, but I am curious about it," DiMeo said. "I understand why the donor might be identified with something like a heart transplant because you can't see it. But this is someone's face and their hands on me. There aren't any hurt feelings, but I will say yes if they are interested in reaching out."

How The Transplant Led To Finding Love

In the months following the surgery, when it became clear that DiMeo's it had been a success, his story hit the headlines. People around the world were in awe of his determination, but there was one person in particular who was captivated by his journey.

In 2021, nurse Jessica Perez, 32, came across DiMeo's story online, and in this modern world of dating, she decided to connect on Instagram. Their romance quickly blossomed, and Perez told Newsweek that they "hit it off right away." Living on opposite sides of the country was no obstacle for them, as the pair wouldn't go a single day without speaking to each other.

"I was just drawn to the way that he carried himself in his interviews. He's a very hard-working person, so despite being disfigured, he was just ready to go back to work. I think that his ambition was what intrigued me the most," she continued.

Figuring out a long-distance relationship isn't easy, as Perez, from California, recalled how it was "hard to leave" whenever she had to return home. Over the first few months, it became clear that they had both found their futures in each other, and they shared a love that Perez had only dreamed of in the past.

"I always hoped that I'd find someone like Joe, and I always imagined that it was possible," she said. "Obviously, I didn't expect it to be with someone who had a transplant, but that's fine because it doesn't bother me. I just always wanted it to be possible to find a person like him."

Getting Through The Backlash Together

The prospect of a lifelong recovery seems much less challenging now for DiMeo, a former product tester, with Perez by his side. The couple face every challenge together, and Perez continues to be amazed by her partner's eternal optimism.

DiMeo regularly discusses his unprecedented story online, as spreading a positive message has always been vitally important. Knowing he can help others is the only motivation he needs, as he recalled the special moment one woman told him that he "helped her to not commit suicide." That thought constantly spurs him on to keep documenting his life.

Together, they aim to spread positivity and raise awareness for organ donation through social media (@jessicakoby) and Perez regularly shows how life changing the transplant has been for DiMeo.

"I just wanted to help Joe put his story out there, and it really does help a lot of people," she said.

Perez continued: "Awareness for organ donation is hugely important. I think a lot of people aren't educated enough about it, so it's been fun to educate others and bring awareness to Joe's transplant. Hopefully, in the future, people will know Joe's story and won't be afraid to donate a loved one's body part because of him."

As much as they love the positive reception they receive, it's impossible to take the good without the bad. They both continue to face criticism and backlash online, as DiMeo often gets trolled for his appearance, while commenters frequently question Perez's motives.

Discussing some of the criticisms she's faced, Perez told Newsweek: "People call me a gold digger, they say I have a fetish, that I'm cheating on him, or that I'm using him, and that is so far from the truth. We love each other, but they can't handle that. I just let them go on because they're jealous."

As for DiMeo, he admits that he often gets likened to Michael Myers in the 1978 film, Halloween, or gets references to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. While that may knock some people down, DiMeo jokes that those are some of his "favorite horror movies, so it's funny."

Most of the comments aimed at DiMeo are online, but on the odd occasion people will stare at him in public, which he finds understandable.

He said: "That negative stuff doesn't bother me, it's just words, and it's only online. It doesn't really affect me in person, but I would stare at me if I saw myself. I understand people are curious.

"Seeing a burnt person is pretty rare, and especially when you have someone with a swollen face and someone else's hands, that's even more rare. I understand and I'm not going to get upset when people look at me."

Looking toward their future, Perez said: "We're a normal couple. We just bought a house and we're working on it together. We're just trying to spread Joe's story and raise awareness."

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