'I'm Fat, I Should Not Have To Buy Two Seats On a Plane'

I started to have issues around my body image when I was in elementary school. Throughout my childhood I was an athlete playing soccer at a high level, so I was in really strong physical shape, but I grew up very impacted by diet culture.

My mother was plus-sized and always wanted to lose weight. I remember her telling me when I was younger: "You never want to end up like me, you never want to be fat, it's literally the worst thing you can be and you will have no life if you are." There was this intense fear of being fat in my family.

During my early adulthood I gained quite a bit of weight for various reasons; I was on medication for my mental health, which made it harder to lose weight. I had chronic back pain due to my degenerative disc disease, arthritis and scoliosis and was traveling a lot.

Initially, I honestly felt I would rather die than stay fat. My issues with body image continued on until my early thirties and I actually still struggle with eating disorders now, which I am in treatment for.

After gaining weight, I started dieting and sharing my weight loss progress on my social media accounts. But eventually I started to realize that even when I was thinner, I still didn't like my body. For me, the issue was never really about my weight or size, it was about not loving myself.

So, I gave up diet culture and went on a journey of self-love. At my thinnest I was a size four and now, at a size 20-22 and the heaviest I have ever been, I love myself more than ever. I don't know exactly how much I weigh at the moment; I don't let numbers determine my worth or my happiness.

Traveling as a plus-sized woman

I travel a lot for work and pleasure, and recently I took a flight from San Diego to Toronto. As you extend farther into the plus-sized realm, accessibility can become an issue. So in the last year, I have needed to plan ahead before I travel on planes.

It's kind of embarrassing, but usually I approach the check-in desk before my flight and ask whether the plane is full and if it's possible I can have a seat with nobody beside me. I do this very kindly; I say: "I am a plus- sized woman and I know it's uncomfortable for others. If that is an option, could I please have an additional seat." I tell them I need a seatbelt extender as well. I really think about those around me, I don't want anybody to be uncomfortable.

However on this flight in particular, that was not an option. I have wheelchair access because of my health conditions, so I was able to board the plane early, thank goodness. Getting down the aisle when it's full can be very hard for a plus-sized person, it's very narrow and you don't want to bump into people.

I politely asked the flight attendant if I could please have a seat belt extender, I don't always need them, it depends on the flight, and she kindly gave me one while I was waiting for everyone else to board.

Taking up more than one seat on the plane

I was sitting on the very last row, so I could not recline my seat at all. Because I had boarded early, I had less stress and anxiety, however I was still really fearful because some people are extremely fatphobic. I was really nervous that I would end up beside someone who did not want to sit next to me, who might make a scene.

Sitting ordinarily, over half of my body was encroaching onto the other passenger's area. I was fortunate, because the armrest on the plane went up. I knew it was a full flight and I didn't want to make the person beside me uncomfortable, so I pushed all my body weight into the side of the seat facing the aisle.

I didn't want to upset the other passenger, they had paid for their seat as well. So, I took all that weight and sat on the edge of the seat with my body in the row and I was in excruciating pain for five hours, which was challenging. Weight doesn't just stop at your hips, so I was trying to make my body as small as possible for the whole flight.

For take off and landing, passengers have to put their arm rests down, but I just left it up hoping nobody would notice. Fortunately, the flight attendant didn't say anything, she seemed really kind.

The person who was beside me was also very kind, we ended up talking and he was an amazing human being. But when he first boarded the plane, he looked at me and then asked the flight attendant whether the aircraft was full or not. It was very apparent that he did not want to sit beside me. I was trying not to make it about myself, but it really hurt.

I totally understand; those seats can be uncomfortable for anyone and being beside someone who is a lot larger than yourself may cause even more discomfort. There was part of me that understood that, but there was also serious pain, embarrassment and humiliation.

Dehumanizing regulations for fat passengers

For decades, airlines have been increasingly decreasing the size of seats, while studies have shown that the American population has gradually been getting larger. After factoring in a pandemic to that situation, a large chunk of the public is plus-sized so, I don't understand why we're not catering to those people.

On top of that, it seems that airlines have been decreasing legroom too, presumably so they can cram as many seats as possible on one aircraft and maximize profit. When you fly business class, the seats and washrooms are a lot bigger. So you can afford accommodations if you have the money. It's a financial privilege, but that's not a privilege everybody has.

The other issue, in my eyes, is how airlines are approaching plus-sized passengers acquiring two seats. Some airlines have a "customer of size policy" in which you can either buy two plane seats next to each other and you will get 100 percent refunded for the second ticket, or you don't even have to buy the second one, they will give you one at the gate when you check in, no problem.

However others have classified obesity as a disability. This means that obese people are entitled to a second seat, however they have to undergo a process that involves getting a medical professional's approval, which in my view is gruelling and dehumanizing, before flying.

The individual has to bring paperwork to their doctor. They write down your height and weight and then you sit down on a sheet of paper and doctors measure the width of your bottom from the widest parts. You then have to submit that information to the airline before your flight to enable medical accommodations. The individual has to pay for this entire process. I can't even comprehend that.

With other airlines, the rules for having to purchase a second seat without any money being given back to you is whether your arm rest does not go all the way down and whether there is encroachment more than one inch into the seat beside you. I believe this is completely dehumanizing.

I am not in the financial position to be able to purchase two seats outright and I honestly feel that as a fat person, I should not have to. I feel I deserve to take up space and to be accommodated by the airline.

I believe that in society, fatphobia is the last acceptable form of discrimination. We put the onus on the individual and we're not taking into consideration any other wider issues. In my view, it's all about profits; the more people they can fit onto a plane, the more money the airline makes.

Paying the "fat tax"

I started to notice the "fat tax," a surcharge placed on larger individuals, a few years ago when I really became plus-sized. In the context of flying, it could mean we pay the money for two seats and even if you're refunded, you need to initially have those funds on your card. Alternatively, you might pay for business class ticket because they are the only seats that really accommodate your size. Because of my body and the space I take up, I have to pay more money. It feels like discrimination.

In my view, fatphobia is so rampant in society because people believe it's an individual problem; they feel this is a reality you have created for yourself because you don't have control over your life. The belief embedded in us is often that slim equals healthy, but when I was thin, I was anorexic and purging.

People often don't also take into account that people can be fat for multiple reasons; it can come from eating disorders, health conditions or medications. However, in my opinion, the diet culture industry is so lucrative, why would we want to preach anything else?

For those who ascribe blame to individual people for their weight, I would ask them to have some compassion, empathy and kindness; have an open discussion about their internalized fatphobia. Why do they see fat as bad?

In my eyes, it's not, it's just a neutral descriptor. I would also have a discussion around medical biases in society, how the stigma of being fat can actually cause a lot more harm than good. We don't know everything about someone's health based on their weight and it's not our place to judge another human being.

While purchasing two airplane seats may seem like a small issue to some people, I believe it 100 percent feeds into wider fatphobia. I think that shaming people and reinforcing the idea that there should be fear around being fat is continuing to create biases in things like our medical industry and preventing equal access to services. It also really affects people's mental health. Even thin people can become so afraid of being fat they starve themselves. I feel it's impacting every facet of society.

I believe that fat people deserve respect, dignity and basic human rights. We deserve to take up space too. I was bullied online after speaking about my experiences as a plus size person, to the point where I fell into a serious depression. I cannot comprehend the cruelness in this world towards fat people.

It's heartbreaking that some people feel entitled to be so unkind to fat people.

Kayla Logan is a body positive social media influencer from Toronto. You can follow her TikTok and Instagram at @kaylalogalblog.

All views expressed in this article are the author's own.

As told to Monica Greep.