How California Women Made Valley Girls a National Obsession

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Girls walk hand in hand though a parking lot toward the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival in Indio, California, U.S. April 15, 2017. Reuters

Newsweek published this story under the headline "Return to the Dollies of the Val" on July 8, 1985. Newsweek is republishing the story.

Ah, summer. Golden memories. Remember the summer of 1982? Chipwiches. Deely Bobbers. You know, Deely Bobbers, those wobbly plastic antennae that everybody wore for no apparent reason. By June, it was hard to imagine that any summer fad could be more annoying. This was shortsighted. By August, fully grown people would be using expressions like "Bag yer face" and "Grody to the max." No two ways about it: summer '82 was the Season of the Valley Girl. The real girl who was responsible for the outbreak recalls that it started as a dinnertable gag. Moon Unit Zappa's imitation of her schoolmates from L.A.'s San Fernando Valley suburbs was so funny that her father -- noted rock weirdo Frank Zappa -- asked the 14-year-old to lay down an improvised rap in the recording studio. It was a satiric gem in its way, a strange five-minute journey into the heart and babble of a shopping-obsessed teen. "I have to wear a retainer," Moon squealed. "That's going to be really like a total bummer, I'm freaking out, I'm SURE. . . "And so on. By summer's end "Valley Girl" was a national hit, the kind of freakish pop-music event that happens when the air is hot and sticky and the deejays' minds start to wander. "I did it to amuse myself, my family and friends," says Moon, "and it was just bizarre to have the whole world in on a joke."

Bizarre, and not entirely pleasant. Besides the usual crowding by fans ("You know, I mean, obviously, from not being recognized to being recognized instantly -- that was pretty startling"), Moon had to field crank calls and hate mail from offended Vals -- and the inevitable nuisance lawsuits: "People said, 'That was my idea. I was going to put VALLEY GIRL on a T shirt'." When the furor died down, she was able to get on with a normal life. She graduated from high school in 1983, two years early, and at 17 is an aspiring actress, with small roles in two upcoming movies.

The Vals themselves have undergone some changes, too. While Malibu and the Sherman Oaks Galleria are still popular hangouts, a 10 p.m. curfew has thinned the Val population in Westwood Village. Ruffled blouses and shaggy hair are now "totally uncool," says one Valley Girl. Men's boxer shorts and high-cut shirts are cool now. So are Ton Sur Ton clothes -- "because they're so expensive." Not surprisingly, 1985 Vals love Madonna. "I admire her because she's so popular and pretty. She just has everything like the typical dream girl," says Melissa Oppenheimer, 16, a sophomore at Westlake High School in Westlake Village.

Changing times can also be read in the Val lexicon. No Valley Girl worth her Ton Sur Tons says things like "Barf me out" these days -- unless, of course, she is a "hoint" or a "grimster" (two words that indicate a total geek). Are your folks sketching on you (nagging)? Are you full aggro (real mad)? Let's jet (go) -- maybe to Surfrider Beach in Malibu, where locals used to spray paint "Valley Go Home" on the walls. Lately a new graffito has been spotted there: "Vals Welcome." Now that a couple of summers have passed, the Val finally seems to be fully rad (very cool) again -- at least in her own backyard.

Uncommon Knowledge

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