Man Cheered for Reason He Kicked Out Friend's Boyfriend: 'Breaking Point'

A 21-year-old man with a disability has turned to the internet for answers after things turned sour on New Year's Eve when his friends disagreed on a restaurant suitable to his needs.

On Reddit, user u/Throwawayconfess17 asked, "Am I the a****** for kicking my friend's boyfriend out of my house after my friends planned a new year's gathering that I can't attend?"

Describing himself as a "full-time wheelchair user," the man wrote: "Alright so maybe I am overreacting, but honestly I've kind of reached a breaking point."

He said his friends went to an eatery that wasn't accessible to him, meaning he had to ring in the new year alone at home. When the friends—some of whom are his roommates—returned home after dinner, he kicked one of their partners out of his property before the night's celebrations had ended.

Explaining the group dynamic, the man stated he and his college roommates are part of a larger friendship group of eight. He expressed his love for his roomies but said they are "a little thick" sometimes.

"There's one person in the large friend group, let's call him Chris, who is dating a guy, let's call him James. I really don't like James for many reasons, mostly petty ones to be honest. But another fact, James is vegetarian. That's not a problem in itself, but herein comes the issue."

The man explained that he lives in a small town with only three restaurants; a steakhouse, vegan and Thai. He said James voted for the plant-based restaurant but the user pushed back, stating it is "completely inaccessible."

When the user offered the alternative of ordering take-out from the vegan restaurant and tucking into it at his place, that option was deemed impractical as a group member is allergic to his cat.

"I suggest we go to the Thai place. It's a nice spot, and reasonably accessible. But apparently, James and Chris went to the Thai place last week for their anniversary, and don't want to go back. I then suggest the steakhouse, but of course, that is loudly shut down because James is a vegetarian," he wrote.

The discussion ended with a group vote and the vegan restaurant won, meaning the user could not attend.

"So New Year's Eve comes and they get back from dinner, and James and Chris also stop by. At this point, it's pretty late and I'm a couple [of] drinks in, and I flat out tell James that I think it's s***** that he suggested and then subsequently campaigned for a place that he knows that I can't go to.

"He said that it's fair because I suggested the steakhouse, knowing he's a vegetarian. I told him that it's different, because he could have at the very least physically been present. He insisted that it's the same, and I asked him to leave the apartment because I was tired of dealing with his b*******."

Gill Hasson, author of Lonely Less: How to Connect with Others, Make Friends and Feel Less Lonely, suggested "thinking ahead and being creative in finding ways to include and accommodate everyone."

Hasson told Newsweek: "In any friendship group, it's more than likely that several of you will have different needs, likes, and dislikes. Certainly, it's important to be as inclusive as you can."

"As individuals, we each need to be aware that, now and again, our needs might not fit with everyone else and cannot be accommodated. When this happens, do the gracious thing; step aside. Suggest that the group goes ahead without you. Be sincere and genuine about this—don't be a martyr or offer to step aside grudgingly and with resentment. Play the long game: simply ask that your needs take priority next time."

What Do the Comments Say?

The top comment on the online forum, with 16,600 upvotes so far, said: "NTA [not the a******]. It isn't the same. They could f****** put up with eating at the same restaurant twice in seven days; you cannot change whether a restaurant is accessible."

Another user said: "I say get new friends. I would only choose a wheelchair-inaccessible place for someone who uses a wheelchair if I REALLY didn't like them, I can't imagine doing that to a FRIEND, especially on a HOLIDAY. At this point, they're just roommates, not friends."

"NTA. Him being vegetarian and you being physically unable to access the restaurant are completely different things. He could've had sides at the steakhouse, or they could've sucked it up and gotten Thai again, or even brought food from the plant-based place to the apartment like you suggested. You gave plenty of options, and they specifically chose the one that directly excluded you," one user pointed out.

"If you are flexible, you can eat veggie nearly ANYWHERE. NTA, and these people aren't your friends," commented another person.

Newsweek reached out to u/Throwawayconfess17 for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.

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