Man Causing His Brother and Two Kids To Be Homeless Praised: 'The Rules'

A man throwing his brother's family out of his house—making them homeless—is being applauded online.

Sharing his story with Reddit's Am I the A******? (also known as the "AITA" forum), user u/Pleasant_Setting7100 explained that he was raised in a "very conservative household."

"My parents and my older brother 'Max' all hold extreme, bigoted views," the 34-year-old wrote in the lengthy post. "I'm gay, so that was hard on me growing up."

In his 20s, Pleasant_Setting7100's grandfather died and left him a large inheritance. He used the money for a down payment on a house in another part of the country, and decided the move was a good time to come out to his family.

"They reacted horribly, saying I was going to rot in hell and that I was dead to them," he said.

In the years since, the poster has landed a great job and met the love of his life, his 35-year-old husband Jonah. A month ago, he received a message from his 38-year-old brother Max, explaining that he had lost his job and that his family—his wife Dani and their two kids—were about to be evicted from their home. As their parents now live in an assisted living facility, Pleasant_Setting7100 is their only option.

"My first instinct was to say no, but when I told Jonah, he said we should give them a chance because Max could've changed and he doesn't want the kids to be homeless," he continued.

So, the poster agreed on two conditions: That Max does not mention politics or disrespect him or Jonah.

"I told Max that if they break the rules, he and his family would be out. Zero tolerance," Pleasant_Setting7100 said. "He agreed."

Max and his family moved in, but it wasn't long before chaos erupted. After a few weeks, Jonah called him at work in tears. He'd asked Max to clean up after his children, but he'd started an argument, with Max telling Jonah that he "didn't want a f** telling him what to do."

The Redditor was furious and asked Max and his family to leave. They refused until he threatened to call the police, but eventually gave in.

"[My brother] said I was a terrible person for making his kids homeless, but I said he did this to himself," Pleasant_Setting7100 wrote.

"Dani then stepped in and apologized for Max and begged me to give them another chance, but I said zero-tolerance means zero-tolerance."

Max has been texting him non-stop asking to come back, saying that his children are suffering at the homeless shelter.

"AITA here?" he asked.

According to Angelika Koch, a relationship and break-up expert at queer-dating app Taimi, it's important to set firm boundaries with homophobic family members.

"This can include being unwilling to tolerate abuse of any kind, inappropriate questions, and disrespectful comments," she told Newsweek.

While you can't control their thoughts or behavior, you can control your response to it.

"It's important to prioritize your own mental health," Koch said.

"Setting boundaries and taking a step back when those boundaries are crossed can help save the familial relationship, as they learn that their actions have consequences."

However, if they refuse to accept your sexual orientation or relationship, and their behavior is intolerable, it might be time to say goodbye.

"These are important things to consider, even when they are difficult decisions to make," Koch said.

Redditors backed Pleasant_Setting7100, voting him "NTA" or "no the a******" in this instance.

"They could not respect OP's simple request that they be civil and now they have faced the consequences of their bigotry," commented ABeerAndABook.

"Your rules were clear and very reasonable, he broke them," agreed IamIrene. "You do not have to set yourself on fire to keep others warm."

"It seems Max really can't help himself, in any respect," said Which_Translator_548.

"The whole reason Max got back in touch with OP was because he needed something," wrote jupiter235.

"He probably planned on never leaving OP's house, either. Or even worse, manipulating OP and his husband into giving the house to him and his family."

"OP's biggest mistake was falling for Max's sob story in the first place," commented Material_Mushroom_x. "OP should be apologizing to his husband for putting him in this situation at all."

Newsweek reached out to Pleasant_Setting7100 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.

If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.