I Had a Mommy Makeover. I'll Never Have Cosmetic Surgery Again

I am a mother to four children. My eldest was delivered via c-section, weighing 8 lbs 8 oz, and my third son was delivered vaginally at a whopping 8 lbs 13 oz.

By the time I had my youngest, my abdominal muscles had been put under so much pressure that I developed diastasis recti.

In simpler terms, I had a five-finger gap in between my abdominal muscles, making it extremely difficult to exercise without making matters worse, or feeling discomfort.

Before pregnancy, I was complimented for having such a flat stomach, and visible abs, even though I never did very much to maintain them. But after having children, my abdominal skin had stretched to the point of no return. I hated the way my stomach looked.

Postpartum, I was always able to drop the weight very quickly, but breastfeeding three out of four of my babies caused my already flat chest to look saggy and deflated.

I felt like I was such a great mom, and deserved to look and feel amazing in my clothes, but no matter how hard I exercised, nothing fixed the loose skin, diastasis recti, and saggy breasts.

Once my daughter turned five years old, I decided that enough was enough and that I was ready to have my mommy makeover surgery done as soon as I could.

As a lot of us know, Miami, Florida is well known for being a cheaper area to undergo cosmetic surgery, and around income tax season, many clinics bait potential patients in by lowering their prices even more, because they assume clients will have extra money to spend.

My tummy tuck with liposuction of the flanks cost around $3,000, while my breast implants were in the region of $2,500. I was also required to purchase a $500 aftercare kit that came with a body-shaping garment and post-op items such as compression socks and Arnicare tablets to reduce swelling.

I was responsible for my own transportation to and from the clinic, as well as my stay. I was told that I should stay in Miami for at least seven days, at which time my drain would be removed and I would be cleared to return home.

My fiance, four children, and my mom came along with me—my mom was there for the first night after surgery—and we stayed in a nice Airbnb for ten days total.

The day before my procedure, I arrived at my cosmetic surgery center and sat for at least an hour to two hours before being called back to check my vitals and undergo the necessary tests.

I was told that I should expect a text message late that night or early the next morning with instructions as to when I should arrive for surgery, and I had lots of paperwork to read over and sign.

I was well aware of all risks with the mommy makeover procedure, and provided my mom's info as my caregiver who would be responsible for picking me up after surgery. I was also told that I could not eat after 9 p.m. the day before the operation.

Around 4 a.m. on the day of surgery, I was contacted and told that my procedure time was set for around 6 a.m. My mom drove me in our rental car from Fort Lauderdale, which was an hour away from the clinic.

I assumed that I was going to be first in line, but boy was I in for a major disappointment.

I sat downstairs, at the entrance of the building, with other women for hours and hours. Patients who had arrived a lot later than I did were being seen before me, and I was there to see them being wheeled out to be picked up.

Every single patient looked like they were in excruciating pain, and I could see blood leaking from their clothes.

By 7 p.m. I was the very last patient left at the clinic. I was finally allowed to go back upstairs to the lobby, where I was called to the back. There, I was able to use the restroom—after being told that I could not urinate until surgery time.

I had never held my bladder for that long before, and was extremely dehydrated and hungry, since I had not eaten or drunk anything since the night before surgery.

Another hour passed before my IV was started by a male nurse, who kept tapping the area where it was placed with his large hands.

I was also unaware that most of the clinic staff did not speak English primarily, which created a big language barrier for all of us.

Eventually, right before the procedure, I was able to meet with my surgeon, who was a very nice guy. He took a look at me and explained what he would be doing.

After being called back to the operating room, all I remember is getting undressed. The next thing I knew I was waking up in the recovery room, in the worst pain I have ever felt in my life.

I have had multiple surgeries, but have never woken up feeling any type of pain at all. Immediately, I felt like something was wrong.

"IT HURTS," was the first thing I said.

I was not given anything for pain through my IV drip after surgery, and to make matters worse, my prescriptions were written and given to the wrong patient.

My mom asked the nurse that wheeled me out to the car if another script could be written, but she was told no because my surgeon had already left. She was advised to give me Tylenol for pain.

That means I went home without pain meds, or antibiotics to ensure that I would not develop an infection in my body. I felt sadness, and was in disbelief that my life was seemingly not cared about—that I could have signed my life away and possibly died in the vicinity of my family and children.

My mom drove to the nearest Walgreens and got the Tylenol for me. I just remember hurting so badly that I could not talk.

I thank God every day for my mom and fiancé because they took great care of me. They made sure that I walked to prevent blood clots, that I ate, and stayed clean at all times.

I called the next day for my prescription to be rewritten, but was told that they could not do so. They said they would call the patient who was accidentally given my scripts and ask her to come back to the clinic with the drugs, which I knew would not happen.

I went a total of four days without any meds other than Tylenol. By then, I was no longer in any pain, and only needed the antibiotics, which I did take.

I was also unaware that every single pharmacy I visited in Miami and its surrounding areas would be completely out of the specific medication that I needed, since cosmetic surgery is so popular there.

When my drain was removed, blood splattered everywhere on the floor, and on my slippers, indicating that I was still draining, but the device was clogged. Was a new drain placed? No.

This later caused me to develop a seroma on my lower left abdomen. Fortunately, my mom is a phlebotomist and was able to fix the problem. Now, there is a hard spot in that area.

Seeing the recent death of superstar Jacky-Oh really made me realize that my experience could have been a lot worse, and that I could have very easily lost my life as well.

I could have left my four children motherless for the rest of their lives, which is so unfair.

Although I feel more confident in my clothes now, and no longer get asked if I'm pregnant because of my loose skin, none of that would have been possible if I never made it out of Miami after surgery.

I do not and will never recommend anyone to go under the knife for issues that really aren't as important as we may feel they are. In my opinion, quick fixes are never as rewarding or as safe as methods that take longer to achieve desired results.

Since developing the hard spot on my lower left side, I feel that my abdomen looks swollen and uneven, and of course, I wanted that fixed. I also began to look at other areas on my body that were not perfect, and started having desires to fix those too.

But now, I have snapped back into my senses, and decided that cosmetic surgery is not something I am willing to endure anymore. I will find a safer route to go down.

Having hip dips is normal, and can be fixed with a great exercise routine, and weight loss can always be achieved and maintained with a proper diet.

I suggest women do what makes them happy, but to always consider the major risks of any choices they make. Nothing is worth shortening your perfectly healthy life, just for temporary satisfaction.

Ebonie Bolden is a mother and social media content creator. You can follow her on TikTok at @thee_ebonieb.

All views expressed in this article are the author's own.

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