Parents Canceling Teen's 16th Birthday Over Comment Made a Year Ago Backed

A mom has been cheered for canceling her daughter's 16th birthday party.

Sharing the story online, the teen's mom posted her dilemma on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA****** forum where it has received over 15,000 upvotes.

In the post, user u/Numerous-Stock2430 explained that she was punishing her daughter for not being grateful for a gift her friend gave her.

"For my daughter's 15th birthday, my spouse and I paid for her to take some of her friends out to a restaurant for dinner. During this dinner my daughter got into an argument with one of her friends. Apparently, my daughter was upset that this friend gave her a cheap gift bought from a thrift store," wrote the mom.

When the other 15-year-old admitted that the gift was from a thrift store, the poster's daughter appeared furious and began insulting her.

"My daughter lost it and called her names like cheap, golddigger, beggar (translated from my language, it roughly means cheap) and other classist insults," said the mom. "My spouse and I confronted our daughter about it and she admitted she insulted her friend. She went on to insult her further."

The mom was so upset with her daughter's behavior that she took away all of the gifts from her birthday and announced that they would not hold her another birthday party until she apologized to the girl.

"My daughter's 16th birthday is coming up next month and she has started talking about what kind of party she wants. I reminded her of our promise that we would not fund any more birthday parties until she has apologized for her behavior at her previous party," she said. "[My] daughter is saying it's been a year and the girl is no longer her friend anyway.

"My in-laws are offering to pay for her party, but we have forbidden them from doing that. Daughter and both sets of grandparents are telling us that we are being too harsh and ruining her social life," she added, asking the internet if she was right to be preventing her daughter from having a party.

Emma Roberts is a parenting expert and counselor who has been working with families for over 17 years. She told Newsweek: "I'm not sure if not allowing her a party is the right way to go about things, it won't change her view of how she reacted to her previous friend. I feel that a better way of going about this is to have a talk with her daughter about how this might have made her feel, and that it's the thought that counts.

"Some people don't have lots of money to buy expensive gifts. I would be saying how sad she may have made her friend and how would she feel if her friend had done it to her."

But online, people were a little less forgiving of the girl's actions and rushed to tell the mom she was right to ban the party.

In over 2,300 comments Redditors share their thoughts.

One commenter said: "Bravo to you for sticking to your guns. This is the best thing you can do for your daughter. You need to talk to your in-laws not to interfere...."

Another wrote: "You are NOT ruining her social life. You are trying to give her an important life lesson. Teenagers can be just miserable. Hold on to the hope that she will work out her angst and turn out to be a decent human being. I believe you're doing the right thing."

"I do think she needs to apologize, but she can't be made to do it," explained Roberts. "It needs to be genuine, otherwise it doesn't mean anything. As kids we can be irrational. I find talking is way more beneficial than punishing."

Newsweek has reached out to u/Numerous-Stock2430 for comment. We were not able to verify the details of this case.

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