Stephen Colbert Jokes Trump Is 'Leaker-on-sheets' Over White House Paranoia

When faced with a slam dunk, Stephen Colbert just can't stay away from those Trump dossier jokes.

So when a New York Times report said President Donald Trump's campaign aides referred to him as 'leaker-in-chief' for his propensity to tattle to the media, Colbert couldn't hold himself back.

"More like leaker-on-sheets!" the Late Show host joked.

Related: Over a quarter of Donald Trump's Twitter followers are not real people, survey finds

"Donald Trump is obsessed with his staff leaking information," Colbert said at the top of his nightly show. "You know how I know that? His staff leaked that information to the New York Times."

After part of the report said aides have to leave personal phones in lockers when they come into work, Colbert responded: "Wait a second! They're taking away the phones of everyone except Donald Trump? That's… I don't… How does that work? How does that help? That's like saying no one can bring knives to work, except you, O.J.,"
Colbert joked.

The White House paranoia is all part of Trump's need for control, the report suggested. That paranoia allegedly includes worries that his food is contaminated. But that was "for good reason," Colbert noted, "once he was eating what he thought was a safe meal and he found a vegetable in there."

SNL's Pete Davidson said that Trump had faked a phone call during the show's table read, in which he announced that his book had gone to number one.

"Not only was this rando phone call aparently faked," Colbert said, "but the book he's referring to, Crippled America, never made it to number one on the bestseller list. It was like Moscow, Trump just sat there while someone else went number one."

He just can't stop himself.

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