Woman Backed for Rejecting Mother-in-Law's Vacation Plans With Her Sick Kid

The internet has backed a mom who refused to let her terminally ill daughter go on a trip across the country with her mother-in-law, fearing she may die away from her.

In a post shared on Reddit last Sunday, the mother, who goes by the username u/melodybeepbop92, explained that her daughter, who is a few weeks away from her third birthday, is suffering from cancer, and doctors have told the parents she won't make it.

According to statistics by the American Cancer Society, about 10,470 children in the United States under the age of 15 will be diagnosed with cancer in 2022.

Childhood cancer rates have been rising slightly for the past few decades. Because of major treatment advances in recent decades, 85 percent of children with cancer now survive 5 years or more.

Children's Cancer and Leukemia Group says that most terminally ill children find that having their parents with them during their last few days is an immense comfort.

The organization stresses the fact that respect for the child's wishes is also very important, and listening to what they say, as well as being aware of what they don't say, is the parents' priority.

It is also advised to help the child with "unfinished business", like goodbyes that were not said or last messages that were not conveyed.

The mother and her husband have tried to spend as much time with their daughter as possible, making as many memories as they can together, sometimes including other members of the family too.

However, her mother-in-law came up with an idea that the mom strongly disagreed with. She called her saying she booked plane tickets and hotel stays to take her daughter on holiday across the country for over a week.

She wrote: "I suggested that my husband and I both go, that way our daughter is comfortable and for god's sake in the event she dies? She can't be gone for a week. Her nurses are here. Her care is here.

"I told my mother-in-law that her decisions that she made alone without consulting us were a solid no. She called me a few names and hung up on me. She then called my husband and called me a few names and suggested she would fight for rights before my daughter dies."

Her husband said they should just "acquiesce to his mother's trip to avoid drama", even though he agrees that their daughter is too young. His wife wants to spend time with their daughter before cancer takes her, so she refused.

The post which was first shared on the r/AmItheA**hole subreddit has gone viral, reaching over 9,500 upvotes and 1,400 comments.

The majority of all users sided with the mother, saying it's her daughter and her right to be with her. One user said: "Nope. Just no. She wants to take your terminally ill daughter across the country for 7 days? And your husband would rather go along with it than tell his mommy no? Has everyone in your life lost their damned minds ?!? Absolutely not. Your daughter isn't going anywhere without you. Period."

Another said: "I would never be able to forgive myself if something happened to my daughter while she was gone if I were in that situation. OP your husband is being ridiculous by even suggesting that you just go along with this. This is YOUR child and no one should feel entitled to take her for that amount of time when she is already on hospice. Your [MotherInLaw] in insane."

A third commented: "Mind blown that the mil would even suggest it. What is wrong with her." And Messychaos added: "Mind blown husband would be ben consider saying yes, what's wrong his him? He's suppose to be the parent protecting his child from harm, he's suppose to be the husband supporting his wife."

While one suggested: "Who else is guessing MIL actually has some treatment she is going to attempt to do while away." And iwantsurprises said: "Ooh I didn't think of this but yes! It makes sense with her saying she was going to "fight for rights" as if she doesn't approve of how her parents are handling things."

Newsweek reached out to u/melodybeepbop92 for comment.

holding ill child's hands
A stock image shows a person holding an ill child's hand. The internet has backed a woman who won't let her terminally ill daughter on holiday with grandma. Getty Images

If you have a similar family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

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About the writer


Maria Azzurra Volpe is a Newsweek Lifestyle Reporter based in London. Her focus is reporting on lifestyle and trends-related stories, ... Read more

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