Mom Demanding Grandparents Get Nose Piercings to See Grandchild Cheered

The Internet hasn't heard an ultimatum like this before.

In a viral post to Reddit's "Am I The A******?" forum, a woman (u/New_Army_5718) shared a demand she's placed on her parents to get their noses pierced before being allowed to see her daughter again after they pierced her baby's ears without consent.

The post has ignited debate, with many rallying behind the woman's decision to enforce a no- or low-contact boundary with her parents. Since it was posted two weeks ago, it has received over 17,000 upvotes and over 3,000 comments.

The incident involved a family trip to Mexico to visit the woman's parents. Upon returning from an outing with friends, the woman said that she and her husband discovered that her parents had taken her one-year-old daughter to get her ears pierced, against her explicit wishes to wait until the child was older.

"I am furious," the original poster (OP) wrote. "My husband said that my parents are not allowed to spend time alone with my daughter ever again. I went farther. I said that I would not be bringing her, or any other kids we might have, down here to see my parents."

The couple decided to cut short their visit and return home. In the aftermath, they faced pressure from family members who dismissed the incident as trivial. Frustrated by her parents' lack of remorse, the OP got creative with a solution.

"I talked with my husband, and we came up with a compromise," she said. "We agreed that we would resume visits, but not alone time, with them if they both got their noses pierced."

The OP said her parents called the deal "stupid."

Did Redditors find her ultimatum fair?

Commenters on Reddit overwhelmingly sided with the woman, saying her parents' act was a violation of trust and boundaries.

"They were willing to do (semi)-permanent damage to your baby directly against your wishes just because they want to decorate the baby," u/pizzadotgov wrote. "It displays a lack of respect for you and for your child. Their aesthetic wants are more important than the grandchild's feelings."

"Instead of apologizing, they put on this whole show and turned the entire family against the OP simply for saying 'Hey it's not okay that you went behind my back, abused the trust I placed in you to care for my child, and permanently altered my child's body after I explicitly said it's not happening,' Stick to your guns, OP," u/mellow-drama said.

Some users offered that perhaps the grandparents' act was not rooted in image but in culture and custom. They acknowledged that in some places and communities, ear piercing at a young age is common and expected.

"In Mexican culture it is VERY common that girls get their ears pierced while being babies, while in the USA having your ears pierced is a big deal and they usually wait until teenage years or older," u/Ita_AMB wrote.

"The cultural context cannot be ignored here," u/shanoony wrote. "I'm Puerto Rican and had my ears pierced as an infant, and it's not the kind of thing my grandparents ever would have considered wasn't okay because it's a pretty standard and noncontroversial thing to do...the context is so important to consider and I'm wondering if they actively went against you or simply didn't realize this was an issue."

Despite the cultural nuances, the consensus among commenters was clear: The parents' decision to disregard their daughter's wishes and pierce her child's ears without consent was a breach of trust that warranted consequences.

Regardless of how the debate unfolds online, the woman seemed firmly rooted in her decision: "We have started blocking anyone who tries to call us and give us s*** for denying my parents their RIGHT to see my daughter," she wrote.