Woman Slammed for Refusing to Let Foster Child Refer to Her as His Aunt

A woman has been slammed online for refusing to let a foster child refer to her as his aunt.

Published to Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole forum, a woman under the anonymous username u/NoLongerAnAunt shared her story in order to receive opinions from the "AITA" community. The viral post has over 4,000 upvotes and 2,000 comments.

The original poster (OP) began her story by explaining that her brother became a foster father to a young boy about a decade ago as the boy's father passed away and the mother was in a rehab facility. The foster worker explained to the OP's brother that he should be there for six months to a year, however, it ended up being six years.

During the time her brother had with the child, he treated him like his own. He made sure the boy had nice clothes, gave him food that he wanted, took him on vacations and other activities. After the boy turned 14, his birth mother was able to resume full custody and retrieved the boy on very short notice.

"I can't explain how devastated my brother was. He was beyond distraught. He thought of this kid like a son, and then legally they weren't anything to each other. He's eighteen now and just started community college. My brother has a different foster child staying with him now. Even though life has gone on, I know my brother is still in pain," she wrote.

The OP explained that she recently ran into the foster child—who is now an adult—at the grocery store with his mother. He was excited to see her and referred to her as "auntie," which is what he called her. She replied, "I'm not your aunt." She could tell he was upset by her comment but went on awkwardly with a conversation.

When she told her brother about the interaction, he thought she was in the wrong and should have "accepted the title gracefully." She argued that the boy hasn't been a member of their family in years so why should she let him call her his aunt?

Newsweek has reached out to u/NoLongerAnAunt for comment.

Newsweek has published several articles regarding conflicts between siblings including a woman who was slammed for "traumatizing" her sister's foster kids.

How to become a foster parent

There are many kids in the foster care system. According to childrensrights.org, on any given day, there are about 424,000 children in foster care in the United States.

Children are placed in foster care due to abandonment from parents as well as other factors including neglect, death, incarceration, abuse, medical neglect or voluntary placement, per verywellfamily.com.

According to the Children's Bureau, the ultimate goal of foster care is to provide a safe, nurturing and stable environment until a child can return home or a family is found for the child to join.

Have you ever wanted to be a foster parent? Here are the requirements to become one, per fostercare.com:

• Potential foster parents must be over the age of 21
• They must go through background clearances
• Be open-minded, dependable, patient and willing to try different parenting styles for children with different needs
• They must have a flexible schedule
• Foster parents should also be tolerant

Redditor reactions

"[You're the a**hole]. He was a kid, he didn't get a choice in where he went or who he saw - that doesn't mean his relationship with your brother was any less genuine. That doesn't mean he hasn't still regarded your brother or yourself as family all this time. So basically; you publicly disowned your nephew because his mother cut his dad of his life," u/StripedBadger wrote, receiving the top comment of over 18,000 upvotes.

U/KaliTheBlaze said, "[You're the a**hole]. You're punishing a child for not keeping in contact during a major upheaval in his life. In adult-child relationships, it's generally the adult's responsibility to maintain contact, not the kid's. Who knows if he even had the means to!"

"[You're the a**hole]. Auntie doesn't just mean blood related. You've just basically said you care so little about you or your brothers relationship with him that you won't acknowledge a casual greeting like that," u/robbyrandall commented.

"[You're the a**hole]. That poor kid saw someone he loved and viewed as an aunt for six years of his life. SIX. And you're blaming him for something he had legally, literally and physically zero control over? You're angry. But you're directing your rage towards someone who did literally nothing to deserve it. I can't even imagine how that kid must be feeling right now," u/Frequent_Train_3259 said.